vacation diary pt. V

It's the end of my trip.

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

I'm on the LIRR. Picked this over taking the subway - it's cleaner, it's faster, and it's much more comfortable. Totally worth the extra $3 I spent.

Plane flight back was ok. Kind of bumpy, and our TVs in our row went out halfway through the flight (so I missed Pardon The Interruption, which did not make me a happy camper), and I was seated next to another chatter (what is it about me?), so it could have been better. The chatter forced me to keep my headphones on at all times, even when I was reading, or sleeping.

I just want to be left alone. Is that too much to ask? Or have a hot seatmate. Instead, I always get kids, or hippies, or new moms with their agitated babies who latch onto me, or old folks...go figure.

Once, when I was flying to Sleepy Hamlet, I ended up having to sit next to a woman who literally spilled into the seats on either side of her. I spent the entire flight leaning into the aisle. The worst part was that the woman on the other side of her had accidentally sat in the wrong seat, leading to the following awkward exchange when the actual person showed up:

STANDING WOMAN: Um, I think you're in my seat.

SQUISHED WOMAN: Oh, really?

STANDING WOMAN: Um, yeah. But you can just stay there, if you want.

SQUISHED WOMAN: No, it's your seat, I should move.

STANDING WOMAN: Um, well, I don't want to make you get up. But it's up to you...

SQUISHED WOMAN: (after a brief pause) I'll move.

Good times.


I really have to pee.



So I had a great time in LA. Every time I visit I debate whether or not I should move there. (You surely remember this epic debate. Or this one. Or this.)

Of course, the question is not "if", but "when".

Anyway, it was great to see all of my friends. And I had a really good time with Li'l Bit. I've come to the conclusion that I really never gave the relationship a fair shake. There are a couple of things she does that drive me frickin' crazy (you don't always have to compare what someone else is doing to what you're doing!), but I have so much fun with her, and I can completely be my stupid, silly, dirty, zany, horny self around her. And she likes it.

But now, it's back to my real life. And that's always the strangest part about returning from vacation - going back to normal. Of course, in my case, normal is only five weeks, before heading off to Rockport...

Hope that you liked these...